Overwhelmed. Stressed. Hurt. Rejected. Angry. Sad. Discarded.
Yes. In spite of it all all, I’m confident that this too shall pass.
I don’t want to be held.
I want to be heard.
I want to be seen.
I want to be acknowledged.
I feel so invisible.
Like my contribution means nothing.
That no one even sees me or my efforts.
Healthy me says what can you do to be noticed? What is it they need?
Unhealthy me says you’ll never matter.
They don’t want you, they don’t need you.
Meanwhile I’m drowning in the middle.
Self pity kicks in. Self doubt.
If only you wouldn’t of gone to prison.
Oh no. Here it is again. The ol’ prison blues.
But still I remain hopeful.
I haven’t given up just yet.
God has shown me over and over that this is simply a detour.
Does it remove the pain? No. But it gives me the strength to get up. To face another day. Determined.
That’s what I am.